Phobiaphobic.

i fucking hate needles i fucking hate needles i fucking hate needles! fuck, tomorrow got ns medical check-up can anyone save me? can i like get excused from drawing blood? or... can they drug me so when they finish drawing as much fucking blood they want from me they can wake me up and i dont feel anything? please please please, i would give anything to be excused tomorrow. but if i dont go tomorrow will i get jailed? waa lao, i hate this man. 

fuck la, i still hate it its making me nervous i cant fall asleep in peace tonight. sorry la guys, i know this sounds dam stupid but i just have to blog my feelings out to feel better. but i dont know why this is the first time it doesn't help!!! i still feel like fuck about needles knn! better hope the nurse is fucking hot, like the one i remembered in the infirmary in PB1 so can distract my attention. argh.... somebody save me from this torture! cant seem to find any fucking escape this time round argh! 

i can only pray the whole goddamn procedure goes smoothly tomorrow and very very very little people around the freaking area to laugh at my chickening out and trembling. hate needles! i still hate needles! do you hear me? do you get me? i hate needles! why must they choose such a stupid way to draw blood! why poke poke poke into your body waa lao, and grace can even say she like the feeling. omg, fuck poking bodies with needles. 

okay, i still dont feel any better. 

so many birthdays! 

15th, happy 18th birthday for clarice and jason! i hope both healthy, both get good A's and both dont suffer any torture like poking needles into veins. okay, sorry jason you're in this with me tomorrow, but i think you not scared. haha. 

17th, happy 18th birthday weehoe! this is about 45mins in advance! no choice because i need to sleep soon, so i can wake up early for dont know what reasons and get poked by needles. anyway i just want to say i love you love you love you so much! you're the best! thanks for all the times you're there for me, emotionally, mentally, physically, almost every possible way. you're so sweet, you're almost there for every of my match and i wish i could do something more than just saying i love you. but i think mellisa will be jealous, so i think i love you is the most i can do. okay, next time give you a good wet kiss, but cannot reject me. and good luck, one more year before you graduate from poly and go for ns medical check up and get poked by needles. eh, please book the earliest slot, because you must go earliest. you need the most time to draw blood, your muscles too big and too thick, you will break all the needles. HAHA. so, dont work out so much! save the needles! for yourself, not for me! hah, love you lots bro.