are all this just obstacles for us? or the end?

i thought problems are always normal in a relationship? i thought those arguments are always normal for us. and after each unhappiness we face, we'll be closer to each other and that our bond is closer? i'm not an experienced in relationships. this is only my second. and i know its only your first. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry that i didn't give u what u wanted, what u expected to have in a relationship. i know i'm a failure in this. i know i didn't give u happiness. instead, all i gave u were my complaints and ramblings. all my insecurities and jealousy just drives u sick. all my temperamental periods and attitude hours makes u leave me alone. for all this, i'm sorry. i know u can use all this to leave it as an excuse to break up with me any moment. but darling, is our love just this strong? to be exact. my love for u started since jan 31st. till finally oct 25th, before we got together. this is not a short period of time, and we went through many times. in between, the times we spent? the love we shared? the tears for each other? the heartaches for each other? the crave for each other? the sacrifice for each other? i just look back at all the times we spent. no matter whether it was a happy or unhappy one. i really cant and dont want to let go of u now. i'm sure that this is not the end of our story yet. no way its so short. maybe theres many times that i'm always thinking of how i feel and not how u feel. many times i just dont understand your intentions. maybe sometimes u're really in a spot and i'm still forcing you. i'm really sorry. i really hope u're at least reading this now. u still might not know how much u mean to me. but u're already more than a part of me. i'm serious bout this. there has been no moments spent without u. there'll always be u in my heart whether i'm happy or sad. i think bout u all the time. whether i just wake up or whether i'm shitting in the toilet. no matter what okay. i feel that the way we're facing our problems together now is that we're not facing it together. thats why we always get unhappy. darling, i really dont want it to end just like that. there is still so much things i want to share with u. and that theres many things we haven't done. theres still so much left for us to do. baby, if u have anything to tell me. just msg me alright? or u can call me. pls dont leave me alone there to think and think. u know how much i can think about. if i'm wrong bout you or anything, tell me okay? i love you! i love you so much and my heart just belongs to u now. darling, i'm missing u so much. and i just hope for my phone to light up with ur heartwarming name appear on the screen. lots of love darling. muahh!!